When “Manning Up” Just Isn’t Enough
Finding a Therapist When “Manning Up” Just Isn’t Enough
For generations, men and boys have been taught a simple, yet impossibly heavy, lesson: be strong, be stoic, and handle your problems on your own. 💪 This cultural norm, while well-intentioned, has created a significant barrier to mental health care, leaving many men feeling isolated and unable to seek help. At Stride Forward, we know that mental health challenges don’t discriminate by gender. Men face the same struggles as women—anxiety, depression, grief, and relationship issues—but are often more resistant to reaching out.
This reluctance isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s a reflection of deep-seated societal expectations. The pressure to “man up” can lead to suffering in silence, which can have devastating consequences. The truth is, seeking help isn’t giving up; it’s a profound act of self-reliance and strength. It’s about taking proactive control of your well-being.
The Specifics of the Search: Why It’s a Challenge for Men
Beyond cultural norms, men face another practical hurdle when seeking therapy. The mental health field is overwhelmingly female-dominated, with men making up only about 20-25% of the therapist population. This can make the process of finding a male therapist, which some men may prefer for comfort or relatability, feel like a daunting task.
For example, a man wanting to work through issues with his father may feel more comfortable discussing it with another man. Or a man grappling with a male-specific issue like body image or career pressures may seek a male therapist who has a deeper understanding of those experiences. This isn’t always a prerequisite for effective therapy, but for many, it can feel like a critical component to building a trusting relationship.
Where Do You Start? Your Roadmap to a Better You
When you’re ready to make a change, the hardest part can be knowing where to begin. You might feel a swirl of competing priorities: should you focus on your personal issues, the strain in your family, or your marital challenges? The answer is simple: don’t worry about the order. The most important step is to start the process.
- Acknowledge the Need: The first and bravest step is admitting that something needs to change. This is the moment of empowerment, not defeat.
- Start the Search: Don’t get bogged down by the initial list of potential therapists. The first step is to simply reach out to an organization or use a reliable online directory.
- Find Your Fit: The process is often a “Venn diagram” of factors:
- Insurance: Does the therapist accept your insurance?
- Availability: Do they have a schedule that works for you?
- Specialty: Do they have experience in the area you want to address?
You might start with a specific idea of what you need, but the right fit might be someone you hadn’t initially considered. Don’t be afraid to have a brief consultation to see if you feel a connection.
- Take a Chance on Yourself: The initial phone call or first session can feel intimidating, but it’s a chance to invest in your own mental health and self-improvement. It’s the moment you stop “manning up” by yourself and instead, take a bold step to build a stronger foundation.
At Stride Forward, we believe in the power of this first step. With the recent addition of several male therapists to our team, we are proud to offer a diverse group of professionals to help you begin this journey. Whether you are ready to tackle personal issues, family dynamics, or marital challenges, we are here to help you get started. You don’t have to carry the weight alone. Reach out and take a chance on your well-being.